Author: Content

The best leaders aren’t the ones who make the fastest decisions.

They’re the ones who make the right decisions—at the right time, in the right way.

But in high-pressure environments, it’s easy to fall into reactive decision-making. Instead of choosing a response, many leaders default to habit—relying on gut instinct, jumping to conclusions, or making choices based on fear rather than strategy.

This is exactly what we tackled in my workshop today with the Bunnings leadership team (part of a 12-week leadership development program I deliver there each year, which my recent Insights articles are based on).

In the workshop, I guided them through three powerful tools to help them slow down, think clearly, and make better decisions—even under pressure.

These tools are game-changers for any leader who wants to move from reactive to intentional leadership.

Here’s what I taught them—and how you can apply it too:

Metacognition: A Leadership Superpower

“Between stimulus and response, there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.” — Viktor Frankl

I shared this quote with the Bunnings team because it perfectly captures the essence of great decision-making.

Many leaders don’t make clear, responsive decisions—instead, they react to whatever is happening around them.

The ability to pause, reflect, and respond strategically—rather than emotionally—is what separates impulsive leaders from decisive ones.

The secret? Metacognition.

Metacognition is awareness of your thinking process—the ability to step back and observe your own thoughts before acting on them.

This creates the “space” that Viktor Frankl refers to, and unlocks the ability to respond rather than react to what is happening in any given moment.

Leaders who develop metacognition:

• Avoid emotional decision-making (no more knee-jerk reactions).
• Recognise when cognitive biases are driving their choices.
• Stay calm and clear-headed under pressure.

So, how do you train this skill?

Mindfulness.

During the workshop, I guided the Bunnings leaders through the Thought Labelling Meditation—a simple but powerful exercise where you practice observing your thoughts without getting caught up in them.

Each time their minds (inevitably) wandered off, I encouraged them to notice not just that they had become distracted, but to observe what had distracted them. I asked them to mentally name the broad category of distraction (planning, worrying, remembering, judging, daydreaming, etc.)

At the end of the meditation, I asked: “What did you notice?”

One of the leaders in the workshop hesitated, then laughed: “I realised my mind is just constantly planning. The whole time. Even when I’m meant to be focusing.”

I nodded. “That’s common. What were you planning?”

He thought for a moment. “Meetings. Tasks. What I need to do after this session. It’s like my brain is on autopilot, always jumping ahead.”

Another participant chimed in. “For me, it was different. I kept rehashing a conversation from earlier in the week—what I should have said, how they reacted. It just kept looping.”

This is what happens when we don’t train ourselves to step back from our thoughts. They run the show. And without even realising it, we’re making decisions from a place of distraction, bias, or reactivity.

But when we build metacognition, we create space.

We notice our thoughts rather than being ruled by them. We gain clarity. We become intentional about where we place our attention.

By doing this meditation regularly, you build metacognition—the foundation of self awareness and vertical development. This in turn gives you the ability to pause before reacting—which is the foundation of great decision-making.

Want to try it yourself? Here’s the Thought Labelling Meditation I shared with the group.

Accessing System 2 Thinking: Slowing Down For Smarter Decisions

Once the Bunnings leaders learned to step back from their thoughts, I taught them how to recognise and work with cognitive biases, which can seriously distort effective decision-making.

To begin with, I shared the work of Daniel Kahneman, the Nobel Prize-winning psychologist who spent decades studying how we think (and founded what we now call “behavioural economics”).

In the 1970s, Kahneman and his research partner, Amos Tversky, made a startling discovery:

Most of us believe we’re rational decision-makers. We assume we carefully weigh options, analyse risks, and choose the best course of action.

But the truth? Much of our thinking is fast, automatic, and riddled with bias.

Kahneman saw this firsthand during his time in the Israeli military. He was tasked with evaluating officer candidates, trying to predict which ones would succeed in high-pressure combat situations.

At first, he and his colleagues trusted their gut instincts—watching candidates in action and making snap judgments about their leadership potential.

The problem? They were almost always wrong.

Despite their confidence, their predictions failed again and again.

That’s when Kahneman realised: human intuition is deeply flawed.

We rely too much on fast, instinctive thinking, even when making complex, high-stakes choices. And those mental shortcuts (or biases) often lead us astray.

To explain why this happens, Kahneman developed a model of the mind with two distinct thinking systems: System 1 and System 2.

System 1: Fast, instinctive, and emotional

Automatic and effortless, based on past experiences.

Great for quick, everyday decisions (e.g., recognising faces, reacting in conversation, hitting the brakes in traffic).

Prone to biases and errors—because it’s built for speed, not accuracy.

System 2: Slow, logical, and deliberate

Conscious and effortful, requiring focus.

Used for complex, high-stakes decisions (e.g., strategic planning, problem-solving, analysing risks).

More accurate—but harder to engage because it takes mental energy.

The Cognitive Biases That Cloud Decision-Making

Even the best leaders fall into thinking traps that distort decision-making. In our Bunnings workshop, we explored six key cognitive biases—and how to overcome them.

Confirmation Bias: Seeing What You Expect to See

This refers to the ubiquitous habit of seeking evidence that supports existing beliefs while ignoring contradictory facts.

Example: A leader favours a job candidate based on gut feeling and overlooks red flags in their record.

Fix: Actively look for disconfirming evidence and get diverse perspectives before making decisions.

The Availability Heuristic: Mistaking What’s Easy to Recall for What’s True

This refers to assuming something is common or likely because it’s memorable, not because it’s statistically frequent.

A common example of this would be when a few recent customer complaints make it feel like service quality is plummeting, even if overall satisfaction is stable.

Fix: Check the data before reacting—patterns matter more than isolated incidents.

The Planning Fallacy: Underestimating How Long Things Will Take

This common bias leads us to optimistically assume a project will run smoothly—which as you’d know is not always the case!

A frequent example is when teams plan for a project to take three months, but unforeseen challenges stretch it to six.

Fix: Add a 30% time buffer, break tasks into smaller steps, and review past timelines.

The Sunk Cost Fallacy: Sticking With a Failing Decision

This refers to the very human tendency to continue with a bad investment despite evidence that you should cut your losses, just because you’ve already put in time, effort or money.

An example of this would be persisting with underperforming software instead of cutting losses and switching to a better system.

Fix: Ask, “If I were deciding fresh today, would I still proceed?”

Anchoring Bias: Getting Stuck on the First Piece of Information

The trap here is over-relying on the first number, idea, or impression you encounter.

For example, a supplier initially quotes $50k for a project, and even after negotiations, $50k remains the reference point—making $45k seem like a bargain, even if it’s still overpriced.

Fix: Get multiple points of comparison before making decisions. Challenge initial figures rather than taking them at face value.

The Halo Effect: Letting One Strength Overshadow Weaknesses

It’s sometimes easy to assume someone is great at everything because they excel in one area.

For example, a charismatic employee who is great at some specific task might get promoted despite poor follow-through and missed deadlines.

Fix: Assess performance holistically, not just based on standout traits.

Do you want to become more aware of the pernicious, hidden effects of cognitive biases in your own decision-making? Use this worksheet (which I gave to the Bunnings team).

Beyond The Brain: Tapping Into Head, Heart, and Gut Wisdom

Cognitive clarity is a great start—but the best decisions don’t come from logic alone. Leaders who rely only on rational analysis risk overlooking critical emotional and instinctive cues. That’s because decision-making isn’t just a function of the brain—it’s also influenced by the heart and gut, both of which contain vast networks of neurons that process information in powerful ways.

Head (rational thinking)

As I outline above, the roughly 100 billion neurons in the brain allow access to logic and statistical decision-making (when we access System 2 thinking, anyway). The prefrontal cortex is responsible for weighing options, predicting outcomes, and applying learned knowledge.

Heart (Emotional Intelligence)

The human heart contains around 40,000 sensory neurons, forming what researchers call the “heart brain”. This neural network sends emotional and intuitive signals to the brain, influencing decision-making. Studies from the HeartMath Institute show that the heart’s signals precede conscious thought and play a key role in emotional regulation, social connection, and leadership intuition.

Gut (Instinctive Knowing) 

The enteric nervous system (ENS), often called the “second brain,” houses over 500 million neurons—more than the spinal cord. This neural network directly communicates with the brain via the vagus nerve and is responsible for “gut feelings.” Research published in Nature Neuroscience found that gut bacteria and the ENS can affect mood, stress responses, and risk perception—all of which shape decision-making.

How “Head Heart Gut Decision-Making” This Helps Leaders Make Better Decisions

Leaders making high-stakes decisions can tune into heart intelligence to assess alignment with core values. The heart’s neural network processes emotional and social information, helping leaders recognise when a choice is right or wrong at a deeper level.

When faced with uncertainty, the gut often detects patterns before the conscious mind does. Leaders who learn to trust their gut instincts can make faster, more confident choices.

In our Bunnings workshop, I guided the group through the Head-Heart-Gut Meditation to help them access all three intelligence centres. The results were striking—leaders who had been overthinking decisions found clarity by accessing not just System 2 thinking but also by tuning into gut instincts and the empathic information being provided by their hearts.

Here is the meditation and the associated worksheet I gave the workshop participants (so they could apply this powerful framework to real-world decisions after the session.

The Shift: From Reactive To Intentional Decision-Making

By the end of the workshop, the Bunnings leaders had a new way of making decisions:

• They stopped reacting impulsively. Instead, they created space to choose their response.
• They recognised when their thinking was biased or flawed. And they knew how to use System 2 thinning to shift into deeper analysis.
• And they learned to make decisions that aren’t just logical—but also emotionally and intuitively aligned.

This is the difference between being a busy leader and a decisive leader.

Want To Try This For Yourself?

If you want to make better decisions under pressure, here are the 3 tools I gave the Bunnings leaders today:

Use this Thought Labelling Meditation to build self-awareness.

Download the System 1 vs. System 2 Worksheet to strengthen critical thinking.

Use my Head-Heart-Gut Meditation (and worksheet) to make more aligned, purpose-driven decisions.

Because leadership isn’t about thinking faster.

It’s about thinking better.

PS, if you’re ready to take your decision-making (and leadership) to the next level, get in touch and I’ll tell you more about my leadership coaching and workshops.

Jenna had every reason to feel good about her leadership.

She had mastered the art of focusing on what truly mattered—prioritising deep work, cutting through distractions, and delivering results. (I’ve shared the secrets for this previously in How I Helped Bunnings Senior Leaders 2X Their Productivity Without Stress).

Her team was engaged and collaborative, thriving in a culture of psychological safety where people felt empowered to contribute, innovate, and take ownership. (If you missed it, I’ve also shared how to create this kind of team environment in another Insights article, The Hidden Factor That Makes or Breaks Your Team’s Success).

By all measures, Jenna was high-performing—and so was her team.

But something was missing.

Despite her success, Jenna wasn’t feeling as energised as she would like. The work itself was fulfilling, but some days felt like a grind. And she wasn’t the only one—she could sense a similar flatness creeping into her team. They were doing great work, but the spark wasn’t always there.

The problem? They had the systems for productivity and collaboration—but not the fuel for long-term engagement.

High performance isn’t just about what you do. It’s about why you do it.

The missing piece? Aligning effort with intrinsic motivation.

Why Productivity Alone Isn’t Enough

It’s easy to assume that as long as you’re working on high-value tasks and leading a strong team, motivation will take care of itself.

But even the most productive leaders hit a point where effort alone doesn’t sustain them. The same is true for even the most high functioning team.

Jenna had built the right habits and systems, but she wasn’t consistently connecting her work to what truly mattered to her or her team.

This is where many leaders (and their teams) begin to lose steam. Not because they’re burned out. Not because the team doesn’t feel empowered to share ideas and take risks. But because they’ve lost touch with the deeper meaning behind their work.

The solution? Intrinsic motivation.

The Difference Between Extrinsic And Intrinsic Motivation

In 2003, a team of researchers at the University of Rochester—Edward Deci, Richard Ryan, and Christopher Niemiec—set out to answer a fundamental question:

What makes people truly happy and fulfilled in the long run?

To find out, they surveyed 147 recent university graduates. These young professionals were at the start of their careers, filled with ambition, and ready to take on the world. The researchers asked them about their life aspirations—what they wanted to achieve and why.

As they analysed the responses, they found that people’s goals fell into two distinct categories: extrinsic and intrinsic.

Extrinsic goals are focused on external rewards (like earning more money, climbing the career ladder, or gaining social recognition).

Intrinsic goals are centred around what gives us a sense of meaning (such as personal growth, strong relationships, and making a positive impact).

The researchers then followed up two years later to see how these graduates were doing. And the results were striking.

Those who had pursued extrinsic goals—status, wealth, and external success—had achieved many of the things they wanted. But their happiness was short-lived. The initial excitement of a promotion or salary increase wore off, and they were often left feeling just as stressed or unfulfilled as before.

In contrast, the graduates who had focused on intrinsic goals reported higher levels of well-being and life satisfaction. They were more resilient in the face of challenges, more engaged in their work, and felt a deeper sense of purpose.

The takeaway?

Extrinsic rewards may give us a temporary boost, but intrinsic motivation is what sustains long-term fulfilment.

This applies just as much to leadership as it does to life. Leaders who rely solely on bonuses, KPIs, and promotions to motivate their teams may see short-term results—but over time, disengagement, burnout, and a lack of real connection to the work can creep in.

On the other hand, when leaders help their teams tap into intrinsic motivation—by aligning work with personal values, purpose, and growth—engagement and performance skyrocket.

When The Spark Fades

I see this play out all the time with my coaching clients. They’ve done everything “right.” They’ve climbed the ladder, built high-performing teams, and hit every KPI thrown their way. But at some point, they wake up and think:

“Why am I still feeling flat? Why does work feel like a grind instead of something I genuinely care about?”

Some of them assume the answer is to quit and start over—a total career pivot, a fresh start. And sometimes, that’s the right move. But more often than not, the real issue isn’t the job itself—it’s that they’ve lost touch with what actually lights them up.

When we dig deeper, we usually find that they’ve neglected core intrinsic values.

Here are some common signs:

A leader who used to thrive on creativity has become buried in admin and reporting.

Someone who once loved mentoring now spends all their time firefighting instead of developing their team.

A naturally empathetic, people-first leader has fallen into transactional check-ins, missing out on the deeper, human conversations that once made their work feel meaningful.

Once they identify what’s missing and intentionally carve out time for those values—whether it’s setting aside an hour a week for strategic thinking, mentoring a high-potential team member, or having real (not just work-related) conversations with their staff—they regain their energy and drive.

They don’t need to leave their job. They just need to reconnect with why they’re doing it in the first place.

So What Does This Mean For You As A Leader?

If you can combine external incentives with a deeper sense of purpose, you create an environment where people don’t just work hard—they care deeply about what they do.

And that’s the key to sustaining motivation and engagement over the long haul.

So if you’ve been feeling flat, uninspired, or just going through the motions, ask yourself two questions:

What intrinsic values have I been neglecting?

What’s one small shift I could make this week to realign with them?

Because when you bring purpose back into the picture, work stops feeling like a grind—and starts feeling like something that matters again.

Rediscovering The ‘Why’ Behind The Work

This is exactly what Jenna did in my workshop. She immediately realised that she had been relying on external motivators—delivering results, achieving goals, meeting expectations. But she hadn’t stopped to ask:

“What is it about my work that actually lights me up?”

“How do I create that same energy for my team?”

So we ran an exercise to find out.

In our workshop, I asked Jenna (and the other leaders in the room) a simple but powerful question:

“What are the moments in your work where you feel most engaged, energised, and fulfilled?”

For Jenna, three themes emerged:

Growth: She felt most alive when she was learning something new or developing others.

Connection: Jenna thrived on strong relationships and open conversations.

Impact: She wanted to see the bigger-picture results of her work, not just hit targets.

But when she reflected on her daily routine, she realised these values weren’t showing up enough.

She was spending most of her time solving immediate problems, rather than engaging in long-term learning.

She was rushing through one-on-one meetings, rather than being fully present with her team.

She was focusing on deadlines and deliverables, without always tying them back to the bigger mission.

Her work was productive. It just wasn’t always purposeful.

So we made three practical shifts:

1.  Reprioritising time for meaningful tasks: Ensuring she had time scheduled into her             calendar for focusing on tasks aligned with her intrinsic values. 

2.  Deepening team conversations: Deliberately taking time to connect with team                       members in non-transactional ways. Getting to know them as people wasn’t just an                 effective leadership strategy—it increased Jenna’s sense of meaning and purpose, too.

3.  Connecting work to impact: Finally, I encouraged her to help her individual team                   members see the bigger picture behind their tasks. They were often so focused on                   putting together their section of the jigsaw puzzle that they had no idea what the larger           image they were contributing to looked like.

The difference was immediate.

First of all, Jenna started to feel more engaged. As she gave time and attention to things that were aligned with her deeper sense of purpose, she regained her sense of enthusiasm for her role.

She started tapping into what’s called “eudaimonic” happiness (which is based on meaning and purpose, and tends to be stable over time and resilient in the face of setbacks and challenges). 

This is very different to the “hedonic” happiness that is motivated by extrinsic values (and is more like going up and down on a roller-coaster—feeling great when things went well but then having this happiness inevitably fade over time).

What’s more, it wasn’t just Jenna who felt more engaged—her entire team started to transform. Instead of just working towards targets, they were working towards something meaningful.

As well as helping them see the bigger picture, Jenna proactively had conversations with each team member about their intrinsic values. The aspects of their role that they would do for free (not that they admitted this to Jenna!)

Jenna then encouraged them to schedule time in their calendars to focus on these intrinsically motivating tasks. Some scheduled in creative time. Others booked lunch breaks with colleagues they wanted to deepen their relationship with.

And pretty soon both Jenna and her team started feeling more enlivened and engaged at work. Their productivity increased. And I know from working with other teams like Jenna’s over the years that ultimately they will stick around longer, reducing retention headaches for HR.

How To Align Your Work With Intrinsic Motivation

If you’ve lost the spark you once felt in your role—or you want to make sure you and your team stay engaged for the long haul—ask yourself these 3 questions:

“When do I feel most energised at work?”

“Are those moments happening often enough?”

“What small shift could I make this week to bring more of that into my daily work?”

And then take one simple action:

If you thrive on coaching and mentoring, carve out more time for development conversations.

If you value creativity, build space in your week for strategic thinking.

If you feel most engaged when you solve tough problems, create uninterrupted focus time.

When you align your work with your intrinsic values, you don’t just perform better.

You lead with energy, impact, and purpose. 🚀

Want to make this shift in your own leadership? Let’s talk. I help leaders create sustainable motivation—without burnout. Shoot me an email, and let’s explore how you can bring more purpose to your leadership.

Mark felt his frustration rising.

One of his team members, Sam, had missed a critical deadline – again. The report was late, the client was waiting, and now the whole team had to scramble to compensate.

Mark had two choices.

He could come down hard: call Sam out in front of the team, demand better performance, and make it clear that this couldn’t happen again.

Or, he could address the issue in a way that strengthened trust and accountability, rather than eroding it.

This moment wasn’t just about one missed deadline. It was about how his team handled accountability as a whole – and whether people felt safe enough to take responsibility for their mistakes without fear or avoidance.

What Google Discovered About High-Performing Teams

Mark wasn’t alone in facing this challenge. As I have written about previously, Google spent years trying to understand what makes teams truly effective.

Their research, Project Aristotle, explored whether the best teams had the most talented individuals, the greatest diversity (or homogeneity), or the right mix of experience levels.

In fact, they analysed over 250 different possible attributes across 180 teams looking for the factors that meant some teams performed better than others.

But they found something surprising. The number one factor in high-performing teams wasn’t talent, experience, or even workload management.

It was psychological safety.

Teams with high psychological safety felt comfortable admitting mistakes, asking for help, and giving honest feedback – without fear of embarrassment or punishment.

By contrast, in teams where people feared blame or judgment, they hid mistakes, avoided hard conversations, and took fewer risks – ultimately leading to worse results.

So how does psychological safety relate to accountability?

In a low-safety culture, mistakes trigger blame and fear. People cover up problems, leading to repeated failures.

In a high-safety culture, mistakes trigger learning and responsibility. People feel safe owning up, problem-solving, and improving.

This brings us to a crucial leadership challenge: How do you build a culture of psychological safety while maintaining high standards of accountability?

One answer lies in Nonviolent Communication (NVC).

What Is Nonviolent Communication?

Dr. Marshall Rosenberg, the psychologist who developed NVC, observed that much of our everyday language is actually “violent” – not in a physical sense, but in the way it creates fear, defensiveness, or disengagement.

We don’t mean to be “violent” in our communication, but when people feel judged, pressured, or manipulated, they shut down. Trust erodes. Engagement drops. Accountability suffers.

Examples of violent communication:

❌ Blame:  “You’re so unreliable. I can’t count on you.”

❌ Guilt-tripping: “I’m really disappointed in you for letting us down.”

❌ Threats: “If this happens again, there will be consequences.”

❌ Demands: “Just do it. No excuses.”

Even if the frustration is justified, this kind of language provokes defensiveness rather than responsibility.

By contrast, NVC fosters trust and accountability by making space for honest expression without judgment. It follows four key steps:

Observations: Stating the facts without blame or exaggeration.

Feelings: Expressing how the situation affects you personally.

Needs: Clarifying what is important for collaboration and success.

Requests: Inviting a constructive next step.

This approach doesn’t mean avoiding hard conversations. It means having them in a way that invites responsibility instead of resistance.

Now, let’s return to Mark and how he applied this in the moment.

How Mark Used Nonviolent Communication (NVC) to Reset Accountability

Instead of blaming or shaming, Mark used NVC to have a direct but constructive conversation with Sam.

Step 1: Observations (Stick to Facts, Not Judgments)

“Sam, I noticed the report deadline was missed again, and we had to push back the client meeting.”

Step 2: Feelings (Express Impact Without Blame)

“I’m concerned because this creates extra stress for the team and puts our client relationship at risk.”

Step 3: Needs (Clarify Core Needs)

“What I need is reliability in our deadlines so that the team can deliver on commitments without last-minute pressure.”

Step 4: Request (Invite a Solution, Instead of Just Criticising)

“Can we talk about what’s going on and what support you might need to make sure this doesn’t happen again?”

What happened when Mark took this approach?

Instead of feeling attacked, Sam admitted he’d been overwhelmed but didn’t feel comfortable asking for help. That opened the door to a real solution – adjusting workload expectations and setting up a check-in system.

The result? Instead of blame or avoidance, the issue got addressed in a way that built trust and accountability.

How Jen Rebuilt Engagement with a Disengaged Team Member

Not all disengagement is obvious, like missed deadlines. Sometimes, it’s quieter but equally damaging—such as when a team member stops speaking up, stops volunteering for tasks, or mentally checks out.

Jen, Mark’s colleague who also attended the workshop, noticed this happening with Alex, one of her strongest performers. In meetings, Alex had shifted from being active and engaged to silent and withdrawn.

She could have ignored it or pushed him to “step up”, but instead, she used NVC to understand what was happening.

Step 1: Observations

“Alex, I’ve noticed you haven’t been speaking up as much in meetings lately, and you’ve been taking on fewer new projects.”

Step 2: Feelings

“I’m a bit concerned because your input is really valuable, and I don’t want you to feel sidelined.”

Step 3: Needs

“I want to make sure you feel comfortable contributing and that the workload is distributed in a way that works for everyone.”

Step 4: Request

“Would you be open to sharing how things are going for you? Is there anything getting in the way of your engagement?”

This opened up an unexpected conversation. Alex admitted he’d felt overshadowed by a newer, more outspoken team member. He wasn’t sure if his contributions were valued anymore.

Because Jen created psychological safety, Alex felt comfortable sharing – which allowed them to address the issue directly.

But What If People Still Don’t Engage?

“What if I do all this, and the person still doesn’t engage?”

This is a common objection to NVC and the idea of prioritising psychological safety.

The first step should always be using tools like NVC to ensure expectations are clear, support is offered, and accountability is framed in a way that invites ownership.

However, psychological safety isn’t about avoiding accountability. If someone continues to disengage or underperform, performance management may be necessary.

But this should be the last step.

The difference?

Traditional performance management is often the first response – a way to control behaviour through fear.

In a psychologically safe culture, it’s the last step – used only when clear, supportive conversations have failed.

When leaders prioritise trust over fear, they create teams that hold themselves accountable – not because they’re afraid, but because they’re committed.

The Bottom Line

Missed deadlines and disengaged employees aren’t just productivity issues. They’re opportunities – moments where how you respond determines whether trust is built or broken.

By prioritising psychological safety and trust using tools like NVC, leaders can transform accountability from something people fear into something they own.

And that’s the difference between a team that struggles with accountability – and one that thrives because of it.